Den Lockiga Fransmannen...

Shake me down

2008-07-31T12:59:00.002+02:00

Life is simple, as I was saying in my previous post: enjoy love!

Love is everywhere, all around us. It's more than the picture many people have, that is, two persons sharing 'something' unqualifiable together. It's something that one needs to be aware of because it can come anywhere anytime. It can be a flower, it can be a baby laughing, it can be the reflection of the sun in the water, it can be a dog barking, it can be the smell of your cup of morning coffee, it can be a cloud in the sky, it can be the smile of an unknown woman in the street, it can be the taste of a baguette, it can be sharing a beer with an old friend, it can be a story, it can be at the cashier in a store, it can be a simple "hello", it can be anything.
Those moments are all the time around you and me. You just gotta take a glimpse of those moments, hold on to it, never expect it, but be aware that they can enter the scene just like this.
It can last month, it can last weeks, it can last 5 minutes, it can last 2 seconds.

Just love!

New start #???

2008-07-29T09:19:00.002+02:00

Quoting this blog a few month ago:

'And then, emptiness... Or new adventures'

Well, so far: emptiness. Still one month to go for new adventures.
Dam it, I hate being stuck at home. Not that I don't like my parents or my friends, not that I don't like the city I live in. It's just the feeling of turning around and not doing interesting things, and by interesting, I mean things that teach me, or at least contributes to my experience. I still have one month to go, it's gonna be a long month, and since yesterday, there are even more uncertainties ahead of me...

I hate to be right when I write a song...

And for everyone: love is too beautiful to be spoiled. When you grab it, don't start making it complicated. Questions and problems arising from it are nothing. Just drop it into the river and focus on what is important: to love and to be loved. Because it's a chance!

Drama

2008-06-02T20:33:00.002+02:00

I have found my first white hair today!
Still don't know what to do? Cut it, laugh, get a new hair coloration, write my last will?

Argh

Oh, and by the way... My cousin is getting married to a friend of mine in the end June. How cute! Yesterday, a surprise was waiting for me: they'd like me to read a text during the blessing! I am very touched!

Beautiful days

2008-05-31T15:57:00.002+02:00

We've been hanging in the park, reading a book, sleeping, chilling out, and it felt good. It was sunny, I didn't care about anything, execpt...

I'm in this state again.

This morning, when we had breakfast, I found serenity again.

I'm not pretending, I'm not playing. I am true again.

And it's a nice day again!

The SIS is over!

2008-05-27T22:27:00.007+02:00

I handed in my thesis yesterday morning. DONE!

We met again in the afternoon with a bunch of friends, and simply got wasted. It was raining. We stayed in, had a huge supply of beer and frozen pizza. Al fell asleep, we draw many things on his skin. Vivi was really drunk too. We played some nice music, chill out, tell stories to remind us the good time we had, and to remind us it's almost gone for ever. We went back quite early though, and my night was hell: dreamt about writing the thesis all night long. Damn it!

This morning, woke up early, like 6.30. Couldn't sleep. So I took a walk, went to the supermarket and bought breakfast. I managed to sleep one hour or so afterward. I joined the others around 4 to have bbq and play soccer, volley and relax in the sun that was back.

Tomorrow, Copenhagen.

Boy, it feels good to be done!

And everyone, check that out!

Big day coming

2008-05-19T17:12:00.004+02:00

Emotions come from simplicity. Simplicity comes from truth. Truth is love. Love is all.

I might think in a too simple way by writing this. But this is just what I feel now. I didn't know that until recently, and I must admit this is a new step in my journey.

Thesis almost done. Just have to review my language and structure, make it look nicer, print it on saturday and get drunk on monday. This will be almost over, just waiting to defend in few weeks.

And then, emptiness... Or new adventures, you never know what can happen, right?
I am very scarred in a sense of future, but I am able to not think about it, then I see clearer. Time is not against us, but it is up to us to make time as a physical place. Time is not about hours and days and weeks. It's just about moments, filled with emotions.

'Coz' we are together and that's somewhere' (Yo La Tengo)

The Kiss, by Klimt

Running for the SIS

2008-05-15T16:27:00.002+02:00

The writing marathon...
The writing marathon, it's gonna be Torsten and I, and maybe some others who will join in 3-4 hours. And from 8pm until God knows when, we'll be writing and writing and writing again, until 50 pages, limit for the thesis report. So yes, by tomorrow morning, hoppefully, I will have my final draft done.

And then, it's gonna feel so good, because tomorrow is friday, and friday I'm in love. And friday night is Indigo @ Blekingska, and tomorrow, there is The Radio Dept. @ Indigo, and you know what? I got my ticket.

And then... It's almost vaccations, or kind of, because then, there is the defence, and the graduation. but after, it's gonna feel good.

But to tell the truth, Zorro will feel lonely, so lonely, and maybe useless.

Tulips

2008-05-11T16:51:00.000+02:00

When you said tulips
I knew that you're mine
When I caught you there
Crying in the night
Wearing my jacket
Wearing that smile
I knew that I'd found you

This could be an opportunity

Were you unawares?
Did it catch you out?
Or did it break you in
Right from the start?
It's as pure as fire
It's as pure as snow
I knew that I'd found you

This could be an opportunity

If you promise to let it
If you promise to let it grow

'Cos you're the one I love

BLOC PARTY

The SIS... U don't know The SIS ?!

2008-05-07T18:50:00.003+02:00

"Farmers practising pastoralism do this for two means: income of course, but also passion. Consequently, their life can be highly socially affected by new environmental constraints such as the conflicts with wildlife"

"Misconceptions in the general opinion as well as for farmers about wolf create tensions that can be solved by a greater spread of information for every stakeholders and by increasing public and ecologist organisations' participation in the development of management plans."

Well, this is what came out from my intense thinking today, and that are now my "theories" or "concepts" I will discuss in my thesis report. Now, I need to argue why and how, and more important, I need to show those generalisations can be transferred to other cases and are not only applicable for the problem of wolves in France. Which leads me to quote Lincoln and Guba, in Gomm et al. (2000):

"Case studies are working hypotheses whose appropriatness from understanding other cases can only be assessed by comparing the fit - the similarities - between source and target cases.'

Oh my god !!!!

Listening today:
Nothing yet !!!

Listening later:
Bloc Party
Bloc Party
Bloc Party

Oh ma chère solitude

2008-05-05T21:25:00.002+02:00

I can't recall the last time I was all alone, in my own place just for me, without anyone. Just me, my laptop, my bottle of Coke, the music and some pictures on the wall. Studying, checking stupid things on YouTube, reading a book, resting my soul or wonder. Noone will come, and I won't go anywhere. Me, myself and me. Well, it feels good. It reminds me of Hawaii, 5 month on my own! I couldn't remember how it feels to be 'home' and alone. But it feels good, it feels free, this freedom I used to love so much. I'm tasting it again. I can feel the sweet and the bitter of my loneliness again. I am on my own, for a little while I hope, and I kinda like it. Yeah, tonite, I remember who I am and what I stand for. I am proud of my freedom again, I am proud to be able to say that I don't expect things from people, and even if I do, it doesn't matter. I'm on my way again, I had lost track of my 'personal legend', but sometimes, shortcuts are inevitable. But here I am again. I see clear. I am serene. And I will write a song tonite. Oh yes, I will.

New start #3 & #4

2008-05-05T14:30:00.004+02:00

I finally moved in my new place. It's a quite small room (10m²), I share a kitchen and a bathroom with three other students (one swedish and two chinese, and btw, chinese food smells a lot), but one in another, it's cheap and that will do. It's maybe a little oldish and dirty, but I don't really mind, after all, I've lived in a CROUS room for over a year back in France, I can survive any type of situations now.

About #4, I don't really know how to put it. It feels good... Maybe that's all I have to say. But it could end sooner than I expect it, so I don't expect this time, nothing at all, I just live it and enjoy it. Because although it's a new start, it's also a new end, or at least it could be.

Listening this week end:
Shout out loud (I got drunk of them)
Camera Obscura (again and again)
Serge Gainsbourg
The Kooks

Doing today:
Thesis - Thesis - Thesis - Thesis - Thesis, and drink coffe !

Spring steals everything

2008-05-02T11:46:00.001+02:00

Two weeks ago, there was not a signle green leaf in town. And today, everything looks so colorful and alive... Spring comes so quickly in Sweden, it's amazing.

But spring steals everything... ID, driver licence, credit cards, few pictures and some useless library cards... it's all gone.

And spring is messing up with everything and everyone. The birds are hysterical, the animals are flirting all around, the skirts are coming back, and sunglasses too, it is time for ice cream and barbecues, everything is just getting crazy, altogether, singing life. And me too.

Listening now:
Velvet teen - A captive Audience
The Radio Dept. (yeah, they're coming soon at Blekingska Nationen)
Dahlia

Doing now:
Gonna check out the evening spring

The problem with a girl named Honesty...

2008-04-28T10:03:00.002+02:00

Hard time, really hard time.
And 'honesty', let's talk about it.

If I am honest, I am true to myself, right? But in return, being honest can hurt others.
If I am not honest, I am not true to myself, right? But in return, it is sometimes better to hide a few things in order to not hurt people.

Tough choice... who to hurt: yourself or others?

So, I decided to be honest anyway, as it wasn't such a big mess already!
And right now, I am tired, and I can't fu..ing focus on my thesis, I am losing it.

So close from the end, I am so close from the end... why?

I wish I had faith in something...

Demon

2008-04-25T10:26:00.002+02:00

After 'Angel', here comes 'Demon'...

'The demon
Running into my blood
Spreading inside my veins
Making me see things in different light
Thanks to the wine
I'm building up this new thing
Thanks to...'

This is a song by Laakso, that I really love, and it's about the fact that he diserved to get wasted tonite, coz it's friday. Well, I think I do too, and thanks to my 'demon' apparently.
Anyho...

I came early this morning to study, I'm at the univ. And I haven't started yet... And I forgot my phone home. That sucks. I feel like my arm is missing, it has become so addicitve that I can't even spend a couple of hours without. Well, usually I can, but not today. What a shame!

Listening today:
The Libertines
Smashing Pumpkins
Laakso (obviously)
Téléphone (because it's the only way to get me in the mood a friday night)

PS: thanks to my readers (now I know I have at least two again :) )

Angel

2008-04-23T16:30:00.003+02:00

Those two weeks I am living are really challenging. Both in good and bad.

My feelings are quite messed up, I don't know where to put my focus on, and I don't know if I should restrain what's inside of me. On one hand, I know myself and I know how I can be emotional and impulsive (can be a bad mixture!) and do things that are not good for me, and so, I keep it up inside me and remain patient. On the other hand, I feel like going in a field and scream out loud my hapiness, my sadness, and free all those emotions and impulsivity, and tell what I wanna tell.

And after all, maybe it was an angel sent to me... If it is, thank you.

Lost in transcription

2008-04-21T16:39:00.002+02:00

Boring day! I am transcribing the interviews I made back in France. Headphones on, laptop playing some recordings at 60% speed (I already hated my voice, but played slower, oh my god!) and my fingers which type and type again... Well, it is shitty work, but necessary.

China is boycoitting France, because of the mess we made for the Olympics. I don't really know where to stand in this event. On one hand, I am really pissed at what China is doing in Tibet (when I say China, I mean the authorities, not the people) and I think protests are necessary. But on the other hand, should protests interfer with a sportive event, one of the oldest event still celebrated? And what is even more troubling is that once more it's in France the troubles started. Are we gonna be for ever the trouble makers, the strikers, the protesters? It's not helping our image abroad unfortunately, and that makes me wanna puke. So yes, I can understand the boycott, and I can understand the protests against China, but I can't understand being judged for things I don't even know what to think about. There are some days, I really wish I was not from France. can I be from Europe instead?

I guess I'm still upside-down from saturday night party... My stomach still feels weird. What is it, really? Anyway, I liked being there, I liked the conversations, I liked the conversation, and I liked everything that happened. Jeez....

Listening today:
SOMA FM - Indie Pop-Rock
The Editors
Camera Obscura
... And you will know us by the trail of dead
+/- Plus/Minus

Stomachache

2008-04-20T17:29:00.001+02:00

My stomach feels weird today. Where does it come from? Sweden, Argentina or from the SystemBolaget?

Anyway, my stomach feels weird!

A day at the library

2008-04-18T17:00:00.002+02:00

It's 17:00. I spent my day at the library, since 9:00 this morning (which makes it a 7hours working day counting breaks).
I am finally able to get my head out of the break-up think and focus on my thesis. It finally starts to look like 'a master thesis', and that makes me feel good. I still have a long way to go, but I'm almost done with the first twenty crappy pages of theoritical background. It is soooo boring, but so useful.
Now, I just need to get my brain on, and start to analyze the whole thing.

Well, it feels good.

Now, going back home (?), gonna lay down in the sofa. Later, ice hockey final and maybe a beer while playing pool at Vildanden pub.

Want to:
- eat a cookie
- take a leak (very urgent)
- play poker

Probably listening later:
Architecture in Helsinky
Yo La Tengo
The Killers

New start #2

2008-04-15T15:07:00.003+02:00

What was supposed to happen happened.
I'm happy and sad.

Happy, because it's a relief. We were under pressure all the time, things were not going good at all and we were hurting each other. I know it is the right decision. Also happy because what I maybe need is a real new start.
Sad, because it's been a nice piece of life. And it's always hard to take the decision to stop being with someone you love.

And now I’m here, all alone
Staring at some shitty photographs
I miss those golden times
These drunken nights on wine
Still I’m only twenty four
Still I’m only twenty four

RHESUS

Want to listen to:
Camera Obscura
The Clash (Train in Vain)
JL Aubert
Shout Out Loud

New start

2008-04-11T15:38:00.004+02:00

It's been a little while I've felt like writting again on this blog. After a year of nothing. What a shame!

I took my decision something like 2 min ago when I checked the blog of another friend. I hadn't done it for many month. It felt pretty good seeing that she was still updating sometimes her virtual space.

Winter has been long as far as I can tell and I am really looking forward the spring, I mean, the real spring. Lund is cold and windy, not too much rain though (who could believe that actually?) It seems the grey atmosphere is following me in every parts of my life. And the damn thesis due 25 of May is killing me. Anyho, everything will be fine sooner or later...

I am organizing our graduation dinner/party/farewell that will happen 13 of June, a friday. Some says it's bad luck, some other says, it's good luck. I say: man, France is playing Italy the 13th of June! Why is the graduation ceremony that day!
Alright, just kidding, I wouldn't miss this event! In France, such things are not usual, and to tell the truth, that will be my first official ceremony. I guess I'm as excited as a 18 yo boy getting out of highschool (finally!) and gets to the real world.
But eh, the real world for me, it's going to be another story.... And no, i don't wanna go back studying in France.

See you

Listening recently:
Kate Nash
shout out Loud
MGMT ('Time to pretend' especially)

Running doves ?!?

2007-05-17T13:15:00.000+02:00

Two weeks witout an entry... I am really sorry.

I can not explain everything that happened in those two weeks: too much maybe, too boring certainly.
I would just say that I run the Göteborg Half-marathon last week-end, in 1h58min57s. Under two hours for a first experience is not that bad, especially considering the facts I am a smoker and I trained three times in the two previous month. Nice picture, isn't it? ;)

Also, I would like to introduce you the "Doves' show" through videos. I realized yesterday that two doves have built a nest on our balcony and are getting ready to lay very soon. Here is the first episode... Enjoy!

To be continued...

So here we are

2007-05-02T14:30:00.000+02:00

Bloc Party...

I don't know where to start. I don't know what to say.

I should go like this. Usually, when I wait for something for a long time, I imagine it in a way. And in the end, it is disappointement, cause what I was xpecting does not happen, and the reality is not as good as I would have liked. For example, Coldplay. I was waiting the concert for months, and i hated this concert.
Last monday, it was more than a year I was waiting to see them, my band, Bloc Party. I have seen many of their gigs on internet, I know them by heart, every little details about them. I was expecting something. What I got was very different though. But better than my expectations.

With david, we showed up ten minutes before the opening. There are not too much people and we get in, we are on the first line, just in the center. Now, it is time to wait two long hours to see them coming. I feel the pressure coming a bit, my legs are moving, i feel nervous. Around 8, more people are here and the supporting band shows up. Three guys, a bit had rock,a bit too simple, not a nice music, we can't hear what they are singing. They only stay for 30 minutes.
Now the hall is crowded. There are sits upstairs as well and with David, we feel a bit old into the crowd. Here in the front side, only young jerks of 18 years olds. That reminds me when I was going to gigs in their age. Whatever, I am young and even if i was not, i ll be at the exact same place.
The technicians are installing everything. Russel did not forget his 30 pedals, Gordy's micro has to be at the right place, not a centimeter on the left. The white drums of Matt, whose birthday was the previous day (important for the following), are checked. Now, let's wait for them, let's wait for Kele to transport us somewhere else.

The lights go off. matt is the first one, followed by Russel, Kele an Gordy. Kele is smiling, as always. He is much more beautiful I thought he was. He's got his red sweater (i was hopping for it actually). Everybody is exciting in the crowd. At the second they got in, I feel this pressure in my back and I am all crashed to david. There are two 15 guys just in front of me and I am a bit scared for them, but they look okay. I can't believe it. Bloc Party, they are here 3 meters away from me, I can almost touch them. It is a dream that comes true. I am already transported somewhere else.

"I am trying to be heroic" starts Kele, alone, without any instruments. And the guitar gets in, the drum, the bass. Song for Clay is so good to get started. Everyone is already jumping and sweating around me. Kele is smiling while he's singing, his voice is so pure. Everything is crazy, I am smiling too, my arm is balancing in the air following the rythm of the drum... I am here, alive, feeling, dancing, forgetting. I am happy and sad. Happy to listen the best music made those last ten years in live. Sad because of the melancholic songs of Kele.

The bass line of "Positive tension" follows. Eerybody is singing. Anyway, it s "so fuckin useless".

Then, they will sing and sing and play again and again. "7.18", "Uniform", "I still remember", "Sunday" ("I love you in the morning, when you are hung over"), the wondeful "Hunting for witches". From the old album, "Banquet", "So here we are", "Like eating glass" (the best song of the nite), "helicopter" for the ending, "She's hearing voices". A B-side with "two more years" and all the ones i forget. The best to me was "this modern love". I think Kele noticed th heart I was making with my hands at the end of the song when he was singins "I'll be yours...", and I think he smiled to me...

I don't want to give more details, I want to keep it for me. ANyway, I am not sure I can express them. It was so....

Just for the fun though... Between two songs, as it was silent, I tried to wish Matt a happy birthday, and so I screamed. And so Kele heard me and said "ah, finally!". But matt did not hear, so Kele said "can you repeat for him?" So, david and I started to sing happy birthday. And as unbelievable as it is, Kele took his microphone and gave it to David, and then, we sung, right in the micro... Happy birthday Matt !!!!

Saturday morning

2007-04-28T11:25:00.000+02:00

I really try to do my best.
Yet, I got those fuking expectations, as usually.
And as usually, expectations are not good.
Damn it, I should know it.
Expectations about everything.
Expectations about everyone.
Why expectations are not fulfilled often?
Do I do something wrong?
I don't think so.

Info

2007-04-26T16:34:00.000+02:00

Please check out this blog and spread the word !!!

http://makechangehappeninlund.blogspot.com

Thanx

BLOC PARTY

2007-04-25T19:36:00.000+02:00

NEXT MONDAY...
ONE OF MY DREAM...
COPENHAGEN...

BLOC PARTY CONCERT

FINALLY...
COZ THEY'RE THE ONES I LOVE...
I'LL BE THE BLUEST LIGHT...

Dubl in my mind

2007-04-23T14:05:00.000+02:00

Dublin...
Capital of the country of Guiness (my goodness...), Dublin vibrates day and night, never stops running, colored by thousands of people for who the time seems to stop for few moments, like me.
Lovely week-end with my dear, B§Bs, long walks between the churches and red briks, a stop in the park, a beer taken on the window of a pub in Temple Bar, staring at people going nowhere, forgetting for a while the daily routine of our studies-party-sleeping. The feeling is pure over there, people are warm and welcoming, the guiness is smooth and the air smells the liberty.
One of my favourite city so far.

Today is much harder, back to Lund and the reality of assignments and presentations, mixed with a feeling of being pissed off by everything and everyone, when one more time, the problem is not everything and everyone, but me. Damn it! I'd like to run away, very far, with nothing to do right now, nothing to think of. Just have a little piece of freedom.

Segolene Royal made it. She is on the second tour of the presidential elections. Sarkozy seems to have a huge advantage, but I still believe and hope she will make it. Anyway, a good step for France: the debate among which democracy is based is back. Only 15 % of absention (the lowest score for the fifth Republique !!!), two opposite candidates on the second tour. Yes, France has made a huge step. Will promises be kept in two weeks, that's another story.
All my support for you Sego!

Where the hell have you been?

2007-04-18T16:32:00.000+02:00

What happened recently to me:
- I went to France for a short trip home. Some good times, some others more troubling. Too short or too long, I don't know, but not what I wanted. A bit disappointed. (Not by saturday nite though... fucking amazing guys!!!)
- BAck to Stockholm for a couple of days with sister and one of her friend. Pretty boring too, hanging out with two 18 years old girls is not for me. I noticed the big gap between my sis and I, nothing to talk about, unable to take any decisions, never knowing in which mood she is and what she'd like to do... Tought time again.
- Then back to school... routine.

Upcoming events:
- week end to Dublin with Lotta: three days just her and me. Wanna be there already.
- Tandem race Göteborg-Lund (not sure yet): i will tell you about it another time ;)
- Göteborg half-marathon: why did I sign up for that? I think I am going to die.
- Week end in Barcelona with my old boss
- 10 days to France in the end of June with Lotta: should hang out between Vichy and Ile d'Oléron.
- Roskilde festival, Denmark
- After that, no real plans, apart starting my thesis. Usch

Apart from that, I'm doing good. A bit stressed sometimes, I still get pissed off pretty easily, and I find myself very demanding recently. At least, I amit it. Money issue is going to be a real one soon, very soon. I tried to communicate recently with some old (pretended) friends who did not answer me. Just give me a reason at least. I hope Liverpool will win the Champions League. Summer is back.

But finally, I am back. Hello.

Way to France...

2007-03-30T19:32:00.000+02:00

Tomorrow, I'm flying back to Vichy, for 4 or 5 days of pure rest!
I guess this is the first time in 3 years I want to be home so bad. I finally realized that I am still rooted there, deeply, and that it feels safe ou there.
My mum is gonna cook me good dinners, I will eat cheese and cheese again, gonna see grand parents, gonna party with my buddies (who by the way don't know I'm coming... surprise tomorrow nite for a crazy night) etc.

It feels so good.

I will miss you though, very much.

Strange days

2007-03-28T19:09:00.000+02:00

There are days, like today, I feel so weak.
It is easy to notice: I am in a bad mood, I don't smile, I am negative about everything, I complain, I say things I don't really think,and I can get angry at people so easily.
But today was different.
Today, I was weak and vulnerable, I lost confidence. But we talked today, and she smiled. And I suddenly remember that I was not all alone in this world. Oh no, I'm not.

Thanx

Paddam, paddam...

2007-03-23T00:15:00.000+01:00

I should be writting a 2000 words paper for tomorow night, and I'm not. I should have started written it yesterday night, but I did not.
No, yesterday night, I went for a french movie instead.

'La môme' (title in english: La vie en rose) or the biography of Edith Piaf.
I realized just before to enter the theater that I knew her without knowing her. I knew the amazing voice and the beautiful lyrics, I knew about the popularity and the crazyness.
I did not know about the chilhood, about how it all started in Paris, about the boxer, about the injections...
I still do not know if the movie is close enought to the reality.

What I know is that Marion Cotillard has played her best movie ever. Sad, dramatic, so true. I smiled, I laught, I cried, so much.

It's been one of the best movie I have seen in a while. Go for it!

Finally, the pictures!

2007-03-20T19:26:00.000+01:00

Lau has come the time of a week end.

Thank you.
When are you coming back?
Oh, btw, I'll be in Paris for one night thursdau the 5th of April. Don't know yet when I'll be there but if I arrive in the afternoon, could I com to the studio at nigh to see you and meet everyone. Please please please...

A little bloody, I know...

Inspiration

Marie-Hélène, me and Lauriane

Je peux aussi dire que je l'aime

2007-03-17T20:23:00.000+01:00

"Un seul être vous manque et tout est depeuplé" (Lamartine)

Yep, it's true. I am wasted right now.
And it's only for two days and a half... Will I survive the french trip? Hummm...

Group works ain't easy

2007-03-15T14:19:00.000+01:00

So basically, I was with Lotta for lunch. 13h15 was my deadline to be back at school to work on the new project. Working in a group implies respect. So I was here on time. Out of 8, 2 just left to take a plane for a week end in Prague, 4 are on a seminar that is not mandatory and 1 has disappeared. So I'm all alone, doing nothing right now but waiting and chatting with Lotta. What pisses me off is that I could be with her instead. Work groups are hard to handle sometimes.

Out of this, everything goes smoothly. The sunny and warm days were perfect and announced the spring that is coming. Yesterday night, surprise for Carol at home. Never wanted to let us know when her birthday was, but we are not fool, and we figured it ourselves. That was amazing to see her smiling so much.

In two days, Lauriane is finally coming to visit Marie and I. It is weird to have a guest that you think you know her for years, but in reality, you've never met her, I mean physically. The agenda is gonna be huge, and I hope the weather will be good. But what I want the most: that Lauriane has fun with us! Lauriane, get ready :) !

Where money goes?

Big day coming

2007-03-10T19:53:00.000+01:00

Yo la tengo, one of this band that never dies.
It all started in 1985, I was one. In 2007, they're still on track, playing here and there their underground rock.
My favourite song, that I played quite often recently is called "Bid day coming". One more song I wish I had written, one more song I want to sing, one more song that makes me escape from life.

Let's be undecided, let's take our time
And sooner or later, we will know our mind
We'll be on the outside, we won't care
Cause we're together, that's somewhere

And there's a big day coming, about a mile away
There's a big day coming, I can hardly wait

Let's wake up the neighbors, let's turn up our amps
And we know we're used to without a plan
We can play a Stones song, sitting on a fence
And it'll sound pretty good, til I forget how it ends

I woke up early, couldn't go back to sleep
Cause I had been thinking of where it all would lead
So I made you wake up, I said, "Let's take a walk,
I wanna hold your hand, we don't have to talk"

Desires and smiles

2007-03-08T14:39:00.000+01:00

She's sitting next to me, on the bed. We're pretending we're studying. The music is far too loud. The looks she has on me are far too intense.

I feel so free in my mind.

She gives me moments, not hours and days...

It's hard to explain

2007-03-05T00:12:00.000+01:00

Okay, I know t's gonna be hard to believe.
I found some videos of my diving instructor in Hawaii, and it turns out that on the following video, the guy you can see at the end is... me!
Pretty unreal, I know. But still, one of the top 5 event of my life.
It was just in front of Waikiki beach, on a deep dive on two sunk ships. Amazing!

I wanna go with you

2007-03-02T13:47:00.000+01:00

My course is over, and it's like summer break has sarted. Tonite, pub with the teachers, big party afterwards. It's gonna be something.

A little song, for someone. Would you like to go to the seaside with me on Sunday? I'd really love to...

Otherwise, snow has melted, birds are singing.

No beer tonite, they suck

2007-02-27T17:56:00.000+01:00

System analysis is almost over. Four days to go: one presentation, one exam, and that's it. We made it, yeah we made it.

I can officially declare it: Laurianne is a Sugar Kid. I wish you all the best possible, I know you diserve eveything that is beautiful out there. Close your eyes, smile on the way, enjoy every people you'll meet, and think of us sometimes...

For the first time in two years and a half, I feel like going home to France. This is a weird sensation, because it comes in a time of my life where I feel confident with everything. Maybe it is the sign that finally, home will be home. So, I'm going the 1st of April!

Snow has melted.

Trolls are not dying. And everybody is happy!

Music wen the lights go out

2007-02-25T17:13:00.000+01:00

I take a break. It's cleaning time here at home. And the mess was huge.

Yesterday night, Jen and I decided to organize a party at my place for our birthday. The LUMESians came around 10.30, with beers, friends and good mood. So many things happened, one more time. Talks, wines, everyone naked in the snow, reggae dance and Beastie Boys, Camille throwing out everything bad inside her (and naked in my bathroom), Jen dancing like a robot, Lotta (it's her name, BTW) who also joined the party, my roomates who offered me a pocket flask (you know, to bring my rhum everywhere!), "Take me out" and Franz, cigarettes break to remake the world, the italiano trying to remember what happened to him the previous night (he woke up with his pants on his knees and 20 kronors in his hands, with a text from someone he did not remember...cool), and me, feeling sooooooooooooooo good!
So thank you everyone for coming, we had so much fun, one more time. You're my family, my friends, my everything, you're simply great.

This morning, parents called, and I could maybe spend few days at home in Vichy in April. Willing to do so. Otherwise, still waiting your call Fred.

Okay, gotta be back to my cleaning: bathroom left... usch!

Western under the snow

2007-02-22T12:24:00.000+01:00

My best friend forgot about my birthday, one more time. I'm not mad though, he's my best friend.

Yesterday nite, Nacho, Eduardo, Torsten and Andrea organized a surprise birthday party for Jen and I. In 23 years, it's the first surprise party ever organized for me. I felt kind of special, and I felt good.

My mood is just so great right now. We had a blizzard those two last days, and there is snow everywhere. Althought I don't like snow that much, I have to admit it's just beautiful out there.

I haven't came back home since two days now and I have been wearing the same underpants and the same socks, things I never usually do. But it's worth it. I wake up every morning in a good mood. The tune of the alarm clock totally sucks though. But I just have to turn away and open my eyes, and I feel... just good, just good.
So, I don't have time anymore to write here as often as before and I'm so sorry for my readers (you're not that many, but still, I know you're here), and I have to say it's harder to write when I feel good, you know, this stupid "sad and melancholic" inspiration. I'll try to come sometimes anyway, just to share a bit of "hapiness" with you guys, it will change from the fall months and my stupid way to love being depressed.

I'm off now. Snow fight downstairs. Like kids. So cool.

I'm a sugar kid

2007-02-19T13:31:00.000+01:00

One more time, I was going in the wrong direction.
Why? Because I was expecting something.

"Unexpected events are likely to enter the scene"

I know it, don't expect things to happen. And saturday night, I was not expecting this.
It feels good.
And she really sucks, so do I. We'll see how it's going on.

And now, I'm going to take a diserved nap.

To...

2007-02-17T14:56:00.000+01:00

The person to whom this video is dedicated will recognize him/herself.
My dear friend, it is up to you, and only you. Don't hesitate a second, don't look back, never.
"Hate the past, regret the future" they said...
Go on, move on, faster, coz' the world is not gonna wait for you. You know where you are today, but you don't know what can happen tomorrow. So do it now, you still have the time, but who knows if tomorrow you will.
I'm waiting for you here, quietly. In my beautiful mess.

Coz' you're the one I...

2007-02-16T21:45:00.000+01:00

I didn't know I was able to challenge myself so much. But I can. It has a price, psychological and physical. But it's worth it.
Right now, I feel empty, washed out, feelingless, euphoric, needless, happy, more mature.

I should know something. The beautiful ladies never walk alone (unless they are smart). Princesses does not walk alone either. But sometimes, they like to take a walk in the park with another one, just to talk.
And now what am I suppose to do? Any suggestions, cause I don't know what is it about?

Little lover's so polite

2007-02-12T21:30:00.000+01:00

Okay, let's say that she doesn't like Something Corporate. Or maybe she wants more. Maybe she doesn't believe in princess and charming prince anymore. Maybe she wants to be a queen, a 'Rock'n'roll queen'. Will I be able?

Anyway, me too, I prefer The Subways.

I read on Marie-Hélène's blog she wants everyone to get naked to make a video. Discusting. But I'm in Marie! Who else?
Beurk

Right on my wall, there is this picture of a sunrise, taken yars ago, when I was in Egypt. We were on a boat, and we got up early to start a visit before it got too hot. And while having breakfast, a red circle appeared above the Nile. This picture follows me everywhere I go. It is like I need to see it every morning when I get up, to remind me that this world has its beauties. I also have a picture of my goddaughter, one of my parents, one of my sister, some with friends. I love my pictures. I got two in my wallet as well, when I was a kid, one with my Mum, one with my Dad. Today, someone asked me if I was not afraid about losing my wallet and then my pictures. What is best? What to do? In one sense she is right. I can lose forever those memories. But on the other hand, what if I'm lost in the middle of nowhere, in a jungle for example, I know that I am going to pass away soon, and I want to have a last look on my pictures.
Tough decision. And what are the chances for me to be lost in a jungle and get killed?

I keep them. Don't steal it please.

Kele Okereke is god

2007-02-11T14:26:00.000+01:00

I can't wait anymore to see them. I'll be in Vega, Copenhagen the 30th of April, maybe in Bourges the 24th of April also, but it seems like I have to wait a millenium.
Anyway, to wait, I've found this awesome video of Bloc Party playing in Astoria, London. The song is their first hit "Little thoughts" and they go totally crazy, especially Kele.
Please, enjoy!

Euphoria !!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-02-09T01:45:00.000+01:00

1.45 am. It is snowing outside.

I've been here since 9.30 this morning, in front of this damn computer. My laptop is out for now, so I have to come here at the univ. The deadline is in few hours, but I am finally done with Mark and Ellen and their stupid fights. Zeynep is next to me, Reshmi is in another room, struggling with her model, Aaron left few hours ago. We've got the radio playing some good indie rock. We ate chocolates and drunk too much coffee. My eyes are very red, and if my roomies call me now to tell me the house is on fire, I'd laught about it. I'm fucked up. But strangely, I really enjoyed making this project. The good news is: that was the first and the simplest one of a total of three.

I don't wanna go home. Because tonite, I have those lyrics stuck in my head.

"If you could be my punkrock princess

I would be your garage band king." (Something Corporate)

Yeah, that's what I should ask her.

It's still snowing.

Tomorrow, Mélanie is visiting me, just for one night. Cool.

Some pics of what I've done those four last days, til 1.30 in the night. Pretty awesome, he?

Let's go on a journey

2007-02-06T22:57:00.000+01:00

I've been thinking of giving up this blog recently. Coz' I feel good. And when I feel good, I have no damn inspiration!
No, it's been 30 minutes I'm typing sentences, delete it, write again, delete and so on.
So I conclude I have nothing to say? No.
So I conclude to be able to write I need to be down? Hum...
Maybe it's better that way.

Maybe it's my time to help again.

I do. I hope I do. Do I?

So I conclude that when you have nothing to say, for any reasons, you'd better shut up. Unless you're asked to say something.
I shut up.
Just for a while.
See you soon.

Stop soccer, start tennis?

2007-02-04T20:27:00.000+01:00

Today, I played a soccer game. And the referee has been one the worst ever seen in years. Well, I suppose I was also too pissed off to be very objective about it, but anyway, when at 2 minutes of the end of the game, I decided to get out in order to not go too far with my words, a song came on my mind. Strangely, there are two versions of this song, one hard rock and one acoustic. But this is the acoustic version which came on my mind, as peaceful as was my day before this football game. The song is from the french band Dionysos and is called Mc Enroe's poetry, in refrence to the tennis player John Mc Enroe who was famous for his talent as well as his expulsions for insulting referees. It goes like this:

I feel like John Mc Enroe
When he puts the strings in glow
John Mc Enroe !

My name is John Mc Enroe
Do you know my poetry ?
It will be written with blood
With the blood of the bad referies

My tennis bag smells like gun smoke
And there's no tennis stuff anymore
There's only strange books big maps
And a picture of a girl with a strawberry face
John Mc Enroe

My name is John Mc Enroe
Do you know my poetry?

The rest of the week end was perfect. And I like Seattle's people, they rock!

I just want to say that...

2007-02-04T03:01:00.001+01:00

... I FEEL GOOD !!!

'Try again' she said

2007-02-01T19:36:00.000+01:00

Life likes to play us tricks, doesn't it? The more I grow up and the more they seem predictible to me, and the better I can deal with them. If you are able to see them not as serious as they are, it's even easier.

Today was a nice day. Almsot spring, sunshine, almsot warm. Because I had no class, I decided to start with a sleeping morning til 11.30. Then, I went and met Yo who needed the help of my car. After that, I went down town. I hang around in the streets, went to the city library to read some newspapers (and I was amazed to see the face of Segolene Royal on different foreigner papers), then bought some running shoes, and finally sat down in a café to enjoy a cup of tea and a sandwich, reading my book. I've recently started 'The Earthsea Quartet'. Hard to start, but once you're in, you cannot get out of the journey. Then, I came back home, chatting and checking Marie-Hélène's blog and her wonders about why french words related to food can't be translated into english sometimes. Thanx to Lauriane for her support and her smile. And that's all that have to be notified for today.

You know what: I'm smiling

Pictures by Camille

2007-01-30T20:19:00.000+01:00

Check-up

With Camille and Tomas

Finished my part already

Suza and Tomas

Work art

Concert

2007-01-29T11:21:00.000+01:00

Try to find me... ^^

Standing in line to see the show...

2007-01-27T12:47:00.000+01:00

Fortunately, the concert tonite is alcohol free. Coz' I drunk too much of those beers, vodka and whisky recently. Geez, the last nite was good, I really needed it.

Everything started on thursday nite. Silvia was leaving the next day, and so we all went out together a last time. We went to a pre-party first with some classmates of Ben, who is studying buisness. I have a declaration to do: even with all the efforts I could make, I'll never fit with those people. There was this danish guy, Berg, that saved me from my desolation. To feel better, I had few drinks... Then, went to a big party with the all 'snobbish Lund'... Drunk more, coz'.... same reasons than above!
Friday morning, back in school at 9. Hangover + 65 students + 65 laptops + Stella programme = HELP !!! At 4pm, everything is over, the week-end is back, and we start with the 'school pub'. More beers, again. Usch. Then back at home for a 40 minutes nap, cold shower, lasagnas, and way to Ariman. There, two Jack's with Eduardo, Nacho and Marina (but not sure it's her name...). Finally, Yellow House. I stopped drinking but water.

That's here I met Thomas, Oleg's friend. Thomas is supposed to play in a concert tonite in Lund, and it turned out that the other members cannot make it. And so, as I had a big buzz, I told him "if you need a basse, I'm in", and then... I'm gonna be in !!! Yeah yeah, for one song sure, maybe two, but I'm gonna be in. My first concert ever... Still don't realize.

Wish me good luck...

About geezes liver

2007-01-24T23:47:00.000+01:00

I eat frogs, I eat snails, I eat geeze livers, I have eaten brain, I have also eaten shark, I tried insects, I love more than anything raw beef and the list could keep going on. I take upon myself.
I don't like war, because there is no good reasons for a war. Even if it's in order to sustain an economy based on oil dependancy. And so, I judge subjectively about these kinds of topics, because yeah, there is no good reasons for this. I take upon myself.
I have a weird sense of humor, I admit. I even don't understand my own jokes sometimes, just to tell... I take upon myself.

But there is something I'll never do: this is using ethnical origins, or worse, a name received by blood to call one of my friend. Never. And you know what, I can accept all the things I do - eating weird stuffs, criticize the policies of my country, having a strange sense of humor - but being judged after my family name, that my father, grandfather and grandgrand father had as well, I just cannot! I could never do that to someone I consider as a friend.... And so, I cannot accept it.

Anyway, I think I will forgive this glimpse of weakness, but I'll never forget, so you know you're not allowed to mess up with me anymore.

Cheers
lolo the curly frog

Bite my shinny metal ass !!!

2007-01-24T22:19:00.000+01:00

Well, no comment on that, I just love it !!!

På franska

2007-01-23T16:43:00.000+01:00

Ok, aujourd'hui, en français (première fois d'ailleurs).

Journée merdique hier. Pas non plus catastrophique, mais dans l'ensemble, j'ai connu mieux. Je vais pas non plus rentrer dans les détails parce que ce n'est pas le point de mon entrée du jour.
Ces journées, comme hier, où le destin se joue de nous, sont parfois si désespérées qu'un petit rien peut rendre le sourire comme ça, en un claquement de doigts. Moi, j'étais en chute libre, je tombais, vite, et je criais, comme on le fait dans ces cas-là, "Mayday Mayday..." Et Mayday est apparue...
Alors je lui ai parlé un peu, ne sachant pas trop ce qui m'arrivait. Mayday travaile à la radio où elle co-présente une émission de radio que j'aime bien. Et puis, comme le monde est petit, Marie-Hélène, une bonne amie, est aussi une bonne amie de Mayday. Alors, vous connaissez les filles, ça papote ça papote, ça se dit les choses, ça s'échange les bons plans, et puis, d'un seul coup, sans crier garre, elle est apparue dans ma liste de contacts MSN, et puis comme ça, on s'est mis à discuter.
Et puis je lui ai dit pour la journée merdique, alors on s'est mis à parler de cela, alors même qu'elle était en plein milieu du programme qu'elle présente... ET puis voilà, j'allais mieux.

MERCI

Les petits riens, qui font les grands moments,
Qui vont qui viennent, quand ils ont le temps,
Ces petits bouts de vie, qu'on attrape en révant...
Saurions-nous les retrouver
Voudrais-tu les partager

JL Aubert

Et ce matin, il faisait jour... (et beau... tu comprendras, j'en suis sûr...)

Swedish winter

2007-01-22T18:05:00.000+01:00

Lund is snowy, finally! And everything is frozen everywhere. In France, it would be a challenge for everyone. As soon as there are 4cm of snow, everyone get crazy and panic is ruling the world. Here, life goes on as usual, cars are on the roads, bikes too, even if sometimes one or two riders end up on their ass. Snow fights are back too. But the feeling that we are in winter is the most important.

Tonite, don't miss the Bloc Party Black Session on the French radio France Inter at 10pm. Hope they gonna play some of their new songs...

In class, we're finally using our brains in a good way. Til now, we basically assimilated knowledges. 'Read and accept' (and remember please) was the daily routine. But our new class is so interesting (at least for me). It is challenging every minute, as it allows us to express our own thoughts and points of view, and that, because we are all different, we have to try to understand others' thoughts, and why not improve ours. 'Thinking out of the box' is cool. Talking about this: how many tales does the wolf have?

L'Abbé Pierre, a famous french preist who fought all his life for homeless and poor people, passed away. He was 94. Our president Jacquot is gonna organize national funerals as he was an important man. He diserves it, of course. But isn't it utopic that our dear Mr Chirac, a neo-classic liberalist who, theoritically and practically, applies a politic based on classe oppression, and so, is at the opposite of what did such a man as L'Abbé Pierre, can without any personal issues, be so ironic? I mean, I'm sick of this hypocrisism from politicians. And even if there is a big respect for the person himself, tell me how many times the French president tried to make his actions easier? Anyway, arguing is not useful for this very sad day. France lost a hero, not a national hero, just a hero, yeah, a real one.

Think twice

2007-01-20T16:09:00.000+01:00

What a week! New course, new roomate, new trouble, new book, new music. But not new hair!

'Tools for thinking' from M. Pidd is my new best friend for a month and a half. Unlearn what I've learned about my way of thinking is the challenge that is facing me and the others. Everything that is on our mind is a system, each behaviour we have can change the flows of those ystems. The objective: being able to modelize all those things... with of course a new approach of thoughts. Challenging? Yes. But so interesting!

Sihem, french girl (originally algerian) has just moved in this week, waiting for Silvia to leave in few days. It's cool to speak french a little bit at home, even though I hope we won't do that too much when the others will be around.

Playing: The Essex Green. You have to check it out guys, really!

New trouble: don't wanna talk about this. Even not not sure it's trouble.

The weather: still killing me. And snow expected maybe on Monday. Usch.

Yesterday evening, small party with kind people. Especially appreciated the talk with Marie-Hélène. I just wanna tell her that she's a very cool girl, very lovely and charming as well, but the best quality in her is that she's real and true, honest, natural. She rocks!

I can't go to Paris in Febuary. Damned schedule and damned money. Why????

lolo/

HonoluLund 2

2007-01-17T23:30:00.000+01:00

Here are the lyrics of a song I used to listen everyday, but that I hadn't in a long long while. Sung and written by Barbara, and then by Jean-Louis Aubert.

N'oublie pas
L'aube revient quand même
Et même pâle
Le jour se lève encore
Etonné
On reprend le corps à corps
Allons-y maintenant
Le soleil se lève encore...

I saw her at the anti-war demonstraion

2007-01-15T23:49:00.000+01:00

We were talking about extreme sports the other night, that made me remember about the sky dive in the summer 2003 I've done in Vichy.
I know since that day what adrenaline means.
This impression of 'flying high' was the most exciting part actually. I knew it would last only a minute, no more, and when you're in the air, you're shared between enjoying 100% the effects on your body, the air blowing into your ears; and also trying to free your mind and to tell yourself you're here, 5 km above everything, free like the wind, you don't think, you are just here, feeling good, tripping in the unknown, going down for the most exciting stuff of a lifetime (apart from love, of course), telling yourself you are invicible up there, nothing can touch you, nothing can annoy you, you're flying... High...

I don't know why I'm talking about this.

Yesterday, I had dinner with my two favourite chinese girls. And tonite, after the esperanto class, Oleg YuKey and yo invited us to their new place for a small and lovely dinner.

Jens Lekman is playing on the radio (inde poprock on SomaFM), the song is 'I saw her at the anti-war demonstration'... When is the next anti-war demonstration? Please?

Norway? Spain? Holland?

Sweden? Sunny? No, it's not a joke!

2007-01-13T17:41:00.000+01:00

Lovely day, lovely mood too. Finally.
I got up with a huge hangover again. Yellow House, Blekingska Nation, Ariman, kebab, and finally home yesterday night. It was grat to be again with all the guys, Torsten, David, Andrea and El Cabroncito (Eduardo) for a beer or two and good talks. It feels better now!

This afternoon, I had planned to meet Karolin for a coffee, so did I. We went to Ariman (again) for a two hours chat. Talked about her, me and the dynamics that needs to be created around entrepreners, researchers and the State. We also discussed about China and the raid she's gonna make soon in northern Sweden. We also agree that Lund is a very snobbish city. We haven't seen a lot each other, but I can say I like spend time with her a lot. She is so mature and aware about life, knows how to defend her opinions an is so passionate when she talks. I hope we gonna meet more often, it's important to spend times with different people.

Now I'm wondering what i'm going to do tonight. Different possibilities:
- go to a movie theater to watch 'Stranger than Ever'
- hang out with some people, drink tea and talk
- stay home and do nothing at all
- stay home and play the bass
- write some letters
- order and clean my room
- get depressed
- go out and walk and walk ad walk again in the city
- spy my neighbours
- chat on MSN
- make the list of all the european countries and start to submit it to you...

Right now I'm hungry and I'm gonna cook something.
Have a good week end everyone.

My next guess is Liechtenstein !?

2007-01-12T00:43:00.000+01:00

I'm done with the paper. I made a shit I think, really. I was writting things without even thinking about it. It was like working in a fatory packing some stuffs. I really feel exploited by LUMES sometimes. Anyway, it should pass, I say 'it should'. We'll see.
Apart from that, it's raining in Sweden, it's windy as well. I'm planning a trip to Paris the first week-end of february. I wanted to watch again the movie from Besson Joan of Arc. I just did it. I have smoked 7 cigarettes today. Oh, I forgot to tell you, during my french trip, I bought my new choose: red Converse. They rock! Beckham has a new contract with... Los Angeles.

You don't get disapointed if you don't expect.

I'm reading 1984 from Orwell. What a dark book. I haven't finished yet. And Theo was right: the most horrible thing that happen in this world is what they're doing with the language: make it as simple as possible, deleting words, to not allow people to think, cause thinking is useless. Yeah, I know, strange stuff, but I like the way he wrote it. You really are inside. Brrrrr....

Okay, maybe Andorra ?!

The tricky situation

2007-01-11T00:47:00.000+01:00

Two of my roomates came back today. The house feel less lonely. We had dinner together tonite.

------

My paper is driving me crazy, you know, the one about wolves in the French Alps. Althought it's very interesting, it takes into account so many parameters that I don't know how to deal with it. Damn it. Here is my CLD (désolé Marie, ne vois pas là un copiage... c juste que... enfin tu sais...)

For other CLD: Marie-Hélène, LUMES 2006.

-----

Dear stranger, I see you keep on coming. I'm glad. I've been reading all my entries recently and also the comments (well, I had to deal with empty times... I know, it sucks). ANd I've been thinking about you a lot and your comments. Sometimes, I feel like you understand me, and it's weird, because I only know two persons on Earth who really got to know who I am really without spending that much time with me. I feel weak when that happens. But it's also those two persons who certainly helped me the more. Anyway...

Well, I'm getting curious. So, do you mind if I ask you your nationality? Yeah, I know, it's like I don't play the game anymore, but I'm curious, so...

Treehouse

2007-01-09T20:52:00.000+01:00

They're swedish, they're called I'm from Barcelona and they're good.
Here they go, in a café in Paris, for a good jam.
I love it

Let's go home honey

2007-01-08T19:41:00.000+01:00

Everybody is wondering about 'home' after this break where a lot of us were in their 'home', I mean family. So I say, why not me?
I'm sure of something. My parents home is not mine anymore. I'm not sure why, cetainly because I don't feel as free as I wanna be over there, maybe because the relationship based on fights I have with my mum doesn't work anymore.
I wrote a comment on another blog today. It says that 'home' doesn't really exist, but it's rather something that would be close to 'feeling good', or at least less melo. In Vichy, I can't say I feel bad, but what is sure is that I feel more melo.
So here is my home? Here in Lund? For now, I guess so. I like the people I share my life with, a lot. But still, this melancoly is still so present some days.
Maybe Summer is right, everywhere you go, after a while, it gets boring. But why did I miss Lund thought? Maybe because it's when we're far from something we like and we miss it we realize we like it a lot. But still, how can I say that my home is here, knowing that in one year and a half I'll be somewhere else, living with new people, taking new habits?

'Home sweet home' does not exist. Or yes, it does. 'Home sweet home' is just a unique place, that is hard to find. And actually, it can be where ever, where ever the one you love is around...

There

2007-01-06T18:50:00.000+01:00

Back to Lund. Strange sensation, a bitter taste on my tongue. I don't think it's because I'm back. I think it's because of the total lack of implication (from myself) when it was time to say goodbye (again) yesterday morning with my parents (especially my mum). I thought they'd understood the last time, but they hadn't. They still think they can hold me all their life, but it's not the rule. I am on my own (well, apart from this tiny detail that is money) and I feel good like this. My "home" is here in Sweden for now, and I have the certainty that it will never be again where I grew up to my parent's house. I have been sure of this for a long time now, and I thought it was clear with my parents, but it seems they still hope, they still consider me as the son coming back every time. But it's over.
I'm not mad though, it's a normal reaction for parents.
Two more days with them and I was not far from depresssion. I know it's not nice at all to say that, but I'm honest.
I'm glad to be back.

Tonite, we have already plan to gather all together for a beer at Ariman café.

I'd like to see snowing now. Really. Oh, by the way, those vaccations were great. Thank you Qiao, Summer, Carol and Theo... I had a lot of fun, even if sometimes you were a bit late or do everything you could (inconcsiously) to annoy me :) You've been the best guests ever !!! Thank you thank you thank you

Listening: Commercial flight

2007-01-02T13:56:00.000+01:00

One more time, I am wondering about myself.
Is it me who is too serious, not cool, following my stupid values? Or is it something else?

First, I thought it was cetainly a cultural difference, or an educational difference. I mean, if I was the guest of a friend, even if all his family would have told me to feel at home, it wouldn't even cross my mind to leave the dinner table to go online and chat on MSN while everyone is still eating, and especially when I have already spent 98% of my day on that. Certainly because when I was a kid, my parents and grandparents kept telling me to not leave the table before my meal was over and that they decide I could get up and go away.
Anyway, that's what happen yesterday night at home with my guests...
I don't blame them, of course not, but I felt terribly uncomfortable with my parents. They seemed to not care at all, but I know (almost sure) that they noticed and were a bit upset. Fortunately, I have the coolest parents in the world, but I don't think this is a reason to do this.
Maybe they were not after all, maybe the more upset was me, because of my seriousness, because of my stupid values, because of the fact I am trying to be a good host and that the respect I get back is to leave the dinner table to not miss more than 10 minutes on internet.

Bah, it's nothing of a big deal. I already forgot it. I hope noone will take it too personnaly. It's just few lines on a blog, just a space where I can say what I can't somewhere else.

2007

2007-01-01T18:11:00.000+01:00

Bonne année
Happy new year
Gott nytt år
新年快乐
Χρόνια πολλά και καλή χρονιά!!

I wish all of you the best...

Paris vs. Paris

2006-12-28T23:43:00.000+01:00

Paris 1.0: the tourist version
Notre-Dame-De-Paris, Les Champs-Elysées, l'Arc de Triomphe, Le Louvre, la Tour Eiffel, the souvenirs shops, shopping, la Concorde etc...
Here is the Paris I got those two last days, and that I had so many times. You just wait in line like every stupid tourists, you look at things like a kid, you enjoy and say it's the best time of your life ever, that this is the most beautiful thing you've ever seen, you buy a small Eiffel tower for your parents, you eat in a restaurant along La Seine, or you're trying to not look like a tourist sometimes, drinking a coffee on a terrace reading Le Monde. It's funny the first times, very cool.
I'm simply tired of this.
Here is my Paris

Paris 2.0: Laurent's version
I get out on Châtelet. I walk straight to Beaubourg and drink a coffee on the bar of this bistrot that is on the corner of the street, not far from the Arcades. After, I walk along he streets, enter the shops, sit down near a fountain. My iPod is always on, playing cool music, rock most of the time. I need something that smells the city. I try to take some new ways where tourists are not. I just walk towards Le Marais. I find a building I know and go to the swedish cultural center. After a fika, I shop some books in this little library in the corner of the street. I come back to Beaubourg and his little café not far from Centre Pompidou, in the back of this little church. I start reading and order a glass of Bourgogne. I like to watch people passing. Later, I may take another Metro to whereever. If my bank account is not too bad, I'll go to the Virgin Megastore on Champs-Elysées. Maybe two hours. Then, it's time for Montmartre, at sunset time, it is the best. I called a friend earlier and he joins me now. We find a Bar à Vin lost in the little streets, where noone go. We're drinking something full of flavor, maybe eat a potatoe. Then, it's time to go home again. On my change in Châtelet, I decide to get out and walk along La Seine, in the light, to the next station.
It feels great. Very melo but great.
Tomorrow...

I was waiting for you

2006-12-27T01:00:00.000+01:00

Being the guide, the one who organize, it is exhausting.
In addition of taking care of my guests, organizing our schedules according to the plans (that i most of the time make), I need also to care about my own things, like bank, other administrative stuffs, visiting family and friends, get the car ready.
Today showed me how it is hard to manage all those things, think about every details, from which way to go to Paris to not forget my teethbrush, from wondering how we all gonna get to Charles de Gaulle airport to charge my iPod, from making my friends happy to remember taking a bottle of water in the car.
It is exhausting.

It is hard to be a good friend, isn't it?

The smiles I got back are enought for me. Making people happy, or at least less lonely, less melo, taking them out of their routine (and in the meantime of mine) is providing me what I need. When others feel great, then I'm okay... just okay.
Sometimes I wish I was still in Hawaii, living on the top of this lovely hill, in Pupukea. The radio is on, it's KTUH playing a good jazz, I got out on the patio, seat on a sunchair, light a cigarette. Some crazy birds are singing, the sun is warming my skin up and the wind just makes me shivering sometimes. Later, I'll take the Dodge and go to the beach for a while, snorkeling with turtles. I will meet some friends, we'll drink a beer or two, sing songs. I'll go back home, watch a movie, the window open to cool the atmosphere. I have nothing to care about but just myself, no plans but mine, no schedule coz it's my day-off. A kind of hypocrit life where he only one on the center of my preoccupations is me.
But it's not myself. I need to do things for them.
After LUMES, I'll go to Africa.

Jeez, that was a late night thought, wasn't it?

Noyeux Joël

2006-12-25T20:01:00.000+01:00

I'm finally back.
Short summary of my last few days:
- 18 hours in a car, it's not easy
- Hairdresser session for Summer and I
- Touring in Vichy, shopping for the last Christmas presents
- Party with friends til 4am
- Good food at home
- Christmas Eve with family
- Christmas day with family
- Gain at least 4 kg in a 24 hours (ask the others if you don't trust me...)
- Presents everywhere
- Dad and Mum very impressive: perfect english, especially after apéritif
- Family amazed
- Friends amazed
- Tomorrow, way to Paris

Hope everyone is okay everywhere else. See you

Road trip

2006-12-21T22:21:00.000+01:00

All right, here we go, all set up, almost on our way to France now...

We'll get up around 4am, take the car for 16 or 17 hours, and get home. My mum would have cooked a dinner, she'll kiss me, hug me, maybe cry. Then we'll join my friends and get wild, certainly.

I'm looking forward to it.

Love to all you, if I don't write again before Christmas, I wish you the best, where ever you are, with whoever. Everyone diserve a piece of love for this day.

Laurent

Pierre et le loup

2006-12-19T11:04:00.000+01:00

Yesterday, I was still hangover from the week-end. I've been pushing myself too far, but how good.
So, now it's time for Christmas presents, Christmas cards etc... but also time to study (already!!!). I feel pretty okay for this paper we have to write. This is the first one we don't have to rely too much on books but rather develop an analytical essay about a local environmental problem. I realize it is much easier to find motivation when it's about such a paper. So, yesterday I started to look around for some backgrounds. I am gonna write about wildlife in the Alpes (France) that interact with pastoralism. Wolves have been back for many years now and their number have grown a lot, accompanied of course by attacks of flocks. Well, the french government, very nice, refund the price of a lost animal anytime. Anyway, farmers are angry. This is emotionnaly hard, because their job is not easy, because it is noble and because it is something necessary for the preservation of mountains ecosystems. But I can tell how chocking to see one of your sheep killed by a wolf (I saw a picture two years ago when I was working in the Alpes). So, the farmers don't wanna go anymore during summer time. The production of milk is in consequence affected in its quality and quantity, and in a second hand, the high mountain pastures are destroyed because not preserved by the presence of sheeps. That leads inevitably to a huge loss in biodiversity, especially for plants and insects.
So here is my deal: what are gonna be some sustainable solutions to this problem, knowing that the wolf is an endangered species protected by european directive? Passionating...

Apart from that, we'll drive all friday long. I'm glad to get home for a while.

Summer and Qiao just called me. They're back from Oslo.

Listening now: Yo la Tengo, Summer (what a coincidence...)

Swedish girls... I'd like to understand

2006-12-17T19:56:00.000+01:00

I don't really remember how I got involved in this crazy saturday night/sunday morning journey, but I was there.

What I remember:
- I went to the Yellow House, we were supposed to watch a movie
- Andrea decided us to go out for a beer
- After walks, talks, negociations, meetings, we finally got into Smalands nation
- I started to talk to Ida
- My friends left
- At 2, Ida took me to Ariman where we met other guys
- We went to a guy's named Jonas, where we drunk some wine, spoke swedish and told stories
- I got out of the place around 6am
- I found my bike and ride home

Pfffffff... I love vacations !!!

Listening now: Franz Ferdinand, Darts of pleasure

VACANCES !!!

2006-12-15T17:30:00.000+01:00

That's it! Three weeks of vacations! Three! Out of LUMES three weeks! It feels good.

Programme:
- get drunk tonight with everyone
- sleep all week-end long, party, eat, sleep, maybe take a shower, why not a brunch on sunday morning
- Monday til Thursday: read and write all my papers (at least try to do the maximum!)
- Friday: wake up at 4am, take my car, pick up Carol, Summr and Theo and drive to Vichy
- Friday night: say hi to my parents, and get out with all the 'Brelots'... bloody it's gonna be :)
- and then, have Christmas with family, go to Paris for few days, get back home for the new years Eve, take it easy and drive back to Lund, with a stop in Amsterdam.

Woohooooo, it feels so good. Everybody started to be out of control, upset and pissed off. But now it is like a release, and I just wanna be in this mood that tells you to not stop before sunrise (well in our case, a 'lightrise in the rain').

BTW, I passed my exam in environmental governance.

And i wish myself to have fun! Thanx.

Lisening: ...And you will know us by the trail of dead, Would you smile again for me.

13th of December

2006-12-14T01:21:00.000+01:00

Santa Lucia... Swedish tradition. To have details about what is it exactly, go here.
The change in schedule was fucking bad. Class at 9.15 this morning, about the writting of a paper. Anyway, we were almost all there, Mats showed up and started his presentation, very seriously. Suddenly, all the teachers entered the classroom, Mats shutted up and a Lucia's procession entered the room. They were six, singing typical swedish songs for about 20 minutes, then followed a huge fika with pepparkakon, the traditionnal Christmas buiscuits. The surprise was nice.
About the class in the afternoon, another surprise. The teacher did not show up.
Came back though, to prepare the little Santa Lucia's party going on at home.

The roomies and I decided to invite few friends over for a glögg (traditionnal spicy warm wine)and cookies. Thanks to Jen, Qiao, YuKey, Yo, Zen and David who came in spite of the rain and the exhausting time we're having now. Silvia cooked some nice pepparkukon, Ben was in charge of the glögg, Carol, the decoration I guess, and I... washed the dish. Anyway, it was nice and quiet, and I had a wonderful talk with Qiao.
*******

Sometimes, it's hard to share a place to live in with other people, that are finally very different from you.
*******

Two more days to hold on. When I think about those who are home right now (Biz Marie).

Sound

2006-12-13T00:56:00.000+01:00

Just a band I like. From Canada. Nice country. I have to check it out some days.
Broken Social Scene, 7/4 Shoreline

Raining day

2006-12-11T22:56:00.000+01:00

I got a letter in my mailbox this morning. An unexpected letter. Thank you.

I'm learning Esperanto.

My sister is so easy to irritate.

Odushka is gonna quit the programme for a year. I feel very sad about it.

Pinochet... finally.

Found a Christmas present for my parents.

Spring seems to be back and out of lazyness. Great.

Have a nice day

2006-12-11T00:00:00.000+01:00

10.59 am. My phone is ringing.

Me: 'Hummmm...'
Jen: 'Hi french guy, it's Jen. What are you doing, we're wating for you.'
M: 'What the fuck! I got back at 4 and you just woke me up'
J: 'But what about the brunch at the nation?
M: 'Come on, I'm sleeping.
Then she gives the phone to Torsten...
T: 'Come on Laurent! You get your ass out of the bed and you join us for the brunch. The sun is shining outside, it's a lovely day, so come and enjoy the sun with us.'
M: 'Holly shit, you win. I'll be there in 20 min'

20 minutes later, I'm in the elevator to the last floor of Lund's Nation building. Jen, Ade, Torsten, Eduardo and another girl I don't know are here. Some other guys all around the place look hangover but alive. I pay and get my breakfast, still half sleepy. I join the other, outside, on the terrace. It's cold outside but I feel okay with only my sweater. It is totally lovely out there. The sun is shining so brightly... We can see all the south part of Lund, far away Malmö and the bridge. I start eating some cereals and fruits with yogurt. I also have two sandwiches, a glass of pineapple juice and a cup of black coffee. We're talking and joking, a moment of pure friendship, a moment that I catch as much as i can, because it's full of happiness, simplicity and truth. It's like forgetting space and time, and all the shitty problems facing. I feel alive. So alive that I even eat a huge pancake with chocolate sauce, ice-cream and banana.

After an hour or so, we decide to move out and go to the Kulturen Museum. This museum, created in 1898, shows different way of life throught time in Sweden mostly, and more particulary in Lund. We start to walk along the houses: here is a farm, here is a church, here is a big building which certainly was a house. Inside, old farmer tools, tables and decorations, like if you were living at this time. We are taking our time. We've lost Jen and Eduardo. We are walking slowly, enjoying the rays of lights that warm our faces and heart. It is so good to see a little of sun.

That was a lovely day. Thak you Jen and Torsten to have called me, really. It is so good to have your company guys, all of you !!!

Tonite was a Christmas party with the LUMESians. We drunk some glög. Everybody brought a small present and put it under a tree. Then everyone caught a number, and one by one, we picked up one of the present. The rule was that instead of picking up a present, you could take the present of someone else, and then this one would go and pick up a new one.
So I was number 9, and I got a pretty nice plastic spoon/fork/knife in one, and a star to put around a light and hang out to a window for Christmas. Eduardo stole it. So I got a big candle and 85% cacao dark chocolate. Not a bad deal, even if I loved the star.

I loved this day, I loved it.

p 100+1

2006-12-07T21:42:00.000+01:00

A hundred post ago, I was wondering:

- Why am I so damn far away from them?

- Why Bush is still president?

- Why there are mouse on my roof?

- Why love goes quite often wrong?

I got some answers, a hundred posts later.

- I am so damn far away because I love travelling around the world, it helps me finding answers, motivations.

- He is still president because he's got the power to be so. 2008: goodbye!

- I don't know the answer for this one. Anyway, it was the roof in Hawaii.

- Because we don't know how to enjoy love, we are not able to see when and where it starts and ends up, because we think love is the center point of everything, but it's not. The center point of everything is: what can things - like love - can bring us. Too many expectations from love. But still, I do believe in it... French romantic :)

Apart from that, I've watched Scoop from Woody Allen yesterday night. Woody is still the best director. Simple movie, with a wonderful Scarlett, that really captures the spirit of London and Kesington. Highly recommanded.

I also watched Babel with Brad. Movie about how life gets tragical sometimes, with fantastic actors (especially the small marocan kid who shot).

A hundred posts ago, I was also wondering what was the reason of this blog, and what would be its content. I still don't know... I'm not sure. Make me feel better? Trying to tell about my hidden feelings in order to get support sometimes? Keep updating my friends? Make you feel happy?

Maybe all those reasons. It's good, we've been threw interesting moments: end of Hawaii, happiness and sadness, a stranger giving good tips, my new life in Lund...

Hope you like this blog people. And I know there are a lot of persons coming here regularly, but who don't leave a comment. Just go ahead, it will please me, really.

Cheers.

Happy 100th post !!!!

2006-12-06T00:33:00.000+01:00

This post is the 100th of this blog. So... happy 100th post 'Den lockiga Fransmannen'.

It seems it's time for celebration. Unfortunately, I'll keep it for sunday and the Christmas dinner with the other LUMESians.

A friend of mine is depressed I think. I am not sure wether or not I can use the word 'depressed'. This friend just seems to not feel good in his/her life right now. In addition of his/her personnal problems (that he/she doesn't want to talk about that much), I think Sweden is not helping a lot: rain and dark at 15.50. I know by experience it is hard to stand it, the long night. When it's here, you just don't do anything but staying home, watching TV, cheking internet, not even studying. You become unsociable and you get irritated very easily. LUMES is not helping neither with the huge amount of readings and writtings waiting for us, even during this Christmas break.
Anyway, my friend is not talking, not going out that much, thinks that his/her life is boring, and even if this friend keeps telling me that everything is all rightand it is just because he/she is not in the mood, I don't believe it. It's been almost ten days it's like this, and I'm pretty worried. I think this friend will read those lines and will recognize him/herself. So just to inform you dear friend, I'm not gonna give up with you, and I'm gonna contibute to make your life more exciting (at least less boring), but it's also gonna be up to you. So be ready and expect anything that can happen...

Talked to my dad today. He seemed worried about me. He even asked how my moral was, if i was healthy, how things were going on in school. He even asked me if I needed money. I did not say yes, even if I should have done so. Don't even know if there will be christmas presents for everyone this year...snif. But the point is: Dad, you impressed me! That's good!

French losers

2006-12-04T22:25:00.000+01:00

P-1
*****

*****
Once upon a time, five gipsies brothers and sisters were going out in a very nice bar/restaurant to drink a glass of wine. When they got inside, everybody were looking at them in a strange way. But the gipsies are never a shame. So they crossed the room and sat down to a table. One of the gipsy, Ciprian, who understood french, was surprised to see that the three gentlemen sitting next to them were french. Because it was a long time ago Ciprian had not listen any french, he approached discretly. As he was getting closer, he figured out that the three gentlemen were not that gentlemen. He tought: 'my oh my! How come three gentlemen come to a very nice and expensive restaurant, eat very good food, but drink coca cola instead of good red wine'. Ciprian quickly understood that those french guys were only fake. While he was sitting down, his deception was totally completed when he heard the three fake-gentlemen talked about him and his brothers and sisters: 'look at those gipsies' they said. Then Ciprian thought they were losers, and to put the shame on them, he looked at them straight in the eyes, with anger.
The losers quickly understood that Ciprian understood french, and they started to turn red like tomatoes. Because Ciprian did not want to create a scandale (he knew perfectly that gipsies are usually not accepted in those restaurants), he just sat down and kept on looking at them in the eyes. After they left, he finally decided to tell the story to Adrian, Ràzvan, Georgeta and Florina, his brothers and sisters, and they were very disappointed.
The day after, because the gipsies did not have money enough to go back in the beautiful restaurant, they went to a private party with other strange people, some gipsies, some french, some swedes... Noone really noticed they were here. So they sat down and started drinking and talking, when suddenly, two of the three losers of the previous day arrived at the party. At the beginning, they did not see the gipsies. And they were talking loud, had fun, flirted with every single girls. The funniest part were that they were quite well dressed but were wearing nice baskets instead of beautiful chooses. It was like being having a tee shirt of Zidane and not be Zidane, only showing the appearances. They were really losers. Because the gipsies never forget, they started to talked louder than the losers, drunk and sung, talking only gipsies stories, acting like real gipsies. After few minutes, the losers noticed that someone else was taking the attention from them, and they realized, chocked, that the gipsies they laught about the previous day were there. The gipsies could have gone to the losers and have started an argument. Instead, they kept on singing and drinking, watching straight in the eyes the losers. The losers started to be so afraid that they shut the fuck up, stopped flirting with girls because they were kind of shame, could not looked at the gipsy family in the eyes, and after a while, they had to leave, because they could not stand it anymore.
Once they left, the gipsies sat down in a room, drunk few more beers and smoked few cigarettes, told stories. And you know what, they had one of the best night of all their life.

The morality is: fucking french people who are so proud of themselves should think twice before to criticize and insult people when they are in a restaurant, because maybe the people they say that are gipsies maybe understand french, because they are french as well. French people, you disgust me, especially you, little "péteux de mes deux" who think that because we spend money on a nice restaurant, we gonna get attention and seemed much more lovely. But guys, remember, drinking coca cola in a 'so-chic' restaurant, it's like driving a Rolls Royce and wear sport clothes.
You losers, I hate you.

Sunday

2006-12-03T23:30:00.000+01:00

P-2
No desire to write
Good party yesterday night
Two more weeks, two more weeks
Gonna sleep now
******

******
Hree is a tset taht Teho sowehwd me. If in a wrod the frsit and the lsat lteer are paelcd crrtcley but the ohetr lteers are not, you wlil udretnsad buscaee wehn we raed our eeys do not sotp on ervey lteers but jsut pay aitenottn to the etitiexrmes of the wrod. So eevn now, I konw you urdstnead. Fnuny, ins"t it?

http://lumes2006.blogspot.com

2006-12-01T15:44:00.000+01:00

Yes, thanx to Ade's idea, here we go with our own blog! THE LUMES BLOG 2006!
Everybody in the class will be able to write posts on this blog, about environmental stuffs, about personal things, about stories (Tim said that telling stories have a lot of influence), about moments we shared together, maybe about politics, certainly about funny stuffs too... well, whatever that will be on our mind!!!
I highly recommand you to check it now, it's here, here again, one more time to be sure you don't miss it! For now, the design is not done, we still have to get everyone involved, and we also need to talk about the sidebars and everything...

Thank you Ade for this brilliant idea.

----

We had a guest lecturer those two last days, Tim O'Riordan. This guy just enchanted us. He is one of the first teacher we had so far in the programme that is so optimistic, and that brought us so many tools to achieve our objectives. He is so motivating! I wish all the teachers in the world were like him. I think the most important lesson I got from him is that it will all depend on the behaviour of everyone, as an individual. Trust, honesty and inner relationships with everyone are the keys... We finally caught a glimpse of hope in LUMES. YEAH !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Apart that, nothing much

uploading

2006-12-01T15:41:00.000+01:00

Couldn't upload this pic yesterday writting the previous blog. but today it works... This is Britta's tracklist, with the corner of a matches box.

One more concert

2006-11-30T18:21:00.000+01:00

Another concert yesterday night.
I met Zeynep and Yo at Smålands Nation, David joined later. We drunk some beers, chatting for a while. I felt very tired, I hadn't slept that much the few past nights. But whatever, we're young...
Around 23.30, the supporting band, Lost Summer Kitten, started to play. Two girls and their guitars, two voices and a harmonica, for three songs a drummer and a basse-player, and a melo pop-folk to cry all night long. But sensations when listening, I promise.
And then, the attraction of the night finally showed up: miss Britta Persson.

A long-hair drummer is sitting on the right side, tatoos on his arms, but he looks very quite and kind. Britta, oh, Britta... She's wearing quite simple clothes, almost like a man: black jean that is too short for her and we can see her socks, black and used tee-shirt, where 3 pins are attached next to the heart, brown choose (men choose I guess but not sure). She is not a complexe girl, and the way she dressed up tonite makes her enchanting, brings up her feminine side. She takes her accosutic guitar. We are just down the stage, there is not that much people, public not really reactive unfortunately. She starts singing the first song, after few technical problems. Her voice is so... While she's playing, she has to stand on her toes coz the micro is too high, but she won't fix it. Her voice is so...The songs are about love, 'boy, you are not my boyfriend', about life 'I'm 24' and other stuffs. She then play with her electric guitar, and also a piano. The music is not very complex but it works perfectly. Her melo-pop reminds me Feist, and the drummer adds this taste of Shivaree. Sometimes, you surprise your foot kicking the rythm, but more often you wanna close your eyes. And her voice is so...
During an hour maybe, she enchants us, and it's over.

I need fresch air, I need to smoke. David and I, we get out and I light a Lucky. We hardly talking, and suddenly, he looks next to me with a big smile: Britta and her drummer! Smiling, she asks me a cigarette in swedish. I laught, give my paquet and in the meantime, tell her that we don't speak swedish. She is kind of surprise but starts talking to us. During few minutes so, we talk about her music, about what we are doing here etc. She's very cool, some swedes starts to chat in swedish to her and she asks them to speak in english, because we are here. Cool, isn't it?

After, David took the piece of paper where their tracks list was.
Her voice was good to cry.

It's been a good day, please take a picture

2006-11-28T22:34:00.000+01:00

I feel like taking pics those days. I also feel very irritable. But I manage and I keep everything inside. I think getting older makes me more reasonable.

From Qiao's window:

Sun behind trees (in case you have not got it yet ;) ):

In front of the astronomy department:

Love makes blind

2006-11-28T01:34:00.000+01:00

The last few posts have been kind of descriptive, I know. But fortunately, I have new thoughts tonite.

This is weird how people act when they are in love with someone that is not, or not anymore, or not in the same way, the same intensity. You can tell them whatever you want, usually tips about what they should do to try to move on, to forget, to stop going down, they won't follow it. I guess this is instinctive. They know that you are right, oh yes, they know it. But anyway, their heart is not sure yet, their heart is not ready to do it, to make the big step forwards the immensity of 'stop-loving-and-feel-so-empty'. This is a hard step to take I think, but if you haven't experienced it, then you cannot understand.
I've got to realize that it is useless to tell them what they should do or not. It's better to sit here, keep an eye open, even if we don't understand, and when the lover needs support, just be here, recomforting. You see, I've been in this situation for such a long time... waiting for something to happen, not ready to move on, still stcuk to the same place. And how lucky I was to have good friends around that was just listening to me when I needed it, even if I know they did not really undertsand, they just respect. And this is the best to do.
I'm going to repeat myself but it's not a matter of time, it's matter of ourself.

Do you remember what you wrote me: 'Don't be sad, everything will be just fine. I promise you'.
You were right. Write me sometimes...

Everything will be just fine...

Should have I been so reasonable tonite ?

2006-11-26T22:39:00.000+01:00

The party in Malmö was terribly good. Came back home around 5, in strange circumstances, but anyway, in one piece. All my thoughts to Reshmi, Jen, Lina, Torsten and Andrea who decided to come back walking. It took them something like four hours and a half. Respect!!!

This afternoon, after a hot chocolate at Ariman, Theo and I tripped into the streets of Lund where I caught few instants.

Blurp

2006-11-25T14:50:00.000+01:00

This morning: hangover.

Got up at 10, went to åsa's place, where I joined some other guys from the butch. Asa is our coordinator and she's moving out to a new place, in the center of Lund, and asked for a hand. A moving truck, twelve guys, in two hours we were done.

Then got back home, I'm gonna eat and sleep, because tonite... way to Malmö. Twin's birthday party !!!

To every people who will read this post, I wish you a wonderful week-end!!!

It's friday, I'm in love

2006-11-25T14:19:00.000+01:00

Here I am, after a crazy friday...

After a good night, without the pressure of any take-home exam to handle in, I got up late in the morning, and took it easy. I finally decided to take my bike to the shop because few things need to be fixed. On my way back to school, I stopped to the music store and stayed like a kid in front of a red Fender basse, 7,995 SEK... Not good for my wallet. And because I'm not ready yet to sell my Cort... Then, one hour in class, got to the systembolaget and get stuff for the crazy week end that is expected. The others left to watch a movie, I just hang out in the streets, as they already put out all the Christmas decoration. After a hot chocolate with cream and marchmallow (highly recommanded, Expresso House) and the reading of a french newspaper, I finally got home, and got ready. After picking up Qiao, we went to Summer's to have dinner together. The pasta were not the best ever, but the chocolate cake was succulent. Around 22, I drove back Qiao, without going upstairs (it was a better idea!!!), went back home, picked up Ben's bike and ride to the Yellow House. Here I joined Adrianne, Camille, Jenny, Oleg, Torsten, David and Andrea. Few beers, some others who joined, and we were on our way to the nation party...

Blekingska Nation...!!!

Blekingska Nation... you killed me!!!
The place is small, a bit out of the center of the city. It looks like another building in the neighbooroud. We smoked one, and got upstairs. It was 23 or so. The music is good, not too loud, the place is not crowded yet. We got some beers. In the back of the room, not that big, a scene with amps, a drum and wires everywhere. Yes, every friday night, they've got a concert. I heard earlier the band who is playing tonite on MySpace, and I found it interesting. And here they go...
Jeans and shirts, no hair upside down, they don't look to be the kind of crazy rockers that jump everywhere. A drummer, two guitarists and a bass player who sings too (respect!). we still don't know what to expect, but anyway, we're in the front, not even 1 meter away from them. "Vi är Sibiria" (we are Sibiria). During an hour or so, they just enchanted me. With their indie pop-folk-rock, all in swedish, they transport me somewhere else for a while (maybe the beers helped a little bit). It was one of those moment you don't think about anything, it's intense, it's serene, your hand is moving alone with the rythm, sometimes you wanna jump, sometimes, you wanna close your eyes and escape thousands miles away, sometimes you just want to kiss this girl who is dancing next to you and who feels the music the same way as you. It was not a rock that breaks everything around, no, it was a mix of Belle and Sebastian, Beatles and the Smith. Sibiria, you wre great. After the show, a very good DJ just played some good indie pop rock, I even heard a nice track from Camera Obscura, and the band even show up to drink few beers, a good occasion to talk a bit with them. Very cool and open, those guys really diserve good things for the future.
So if you have a minute, go on their MySpace, listen it, and why not, find a good music store...

Je rêvais d'un autre monde

2006-11-23T11:55:00.000+01:00

I lost 4 kilogramms since September.
Lebanon torn again.
Trying to get tickets: Bloc Party in London.
Summer: get out!
'Beauty is everywhere'.
Made strange dreams the two last nights.
Oh, thank you Liberalism...
Pouin pouin pouin
Fred, I won. 2.08 am.
Jönköping in two week-ends.
Lionel behind Ségolène: I told you Marie... prime minister!
4 000 unemployed soon in Belgium: Volkswagen...

Hej man, welcome to my poor reality of the week. I should be finished late at night.Tomorrow, I'll get out.

I drink all my juice and enjoy the meal

2006-11-21T22:20:00.000+01:00

Today's lecture has been made by a guest, and what a guest!
An old man, maybe 65 or 70, very calm and serene, well-dressed but not too much, was there when I entered the classroom. The first look at him was imposing respect. When our teacher introduced him, everybody stopped looking for a pen in bags, moving leggs or chairs, whatever could make a single noise. In the environmental field, he played a very important role during the two last decades, as he was the head-diplomate leading the swedish delegation from the Rio Summit to the Johannesburg Summit, passing through different protocole on desertification and climate change, notably Kyoto. His name is Bo Kjellén, and his lecture has been one the most passionating I've ever had.

Apart this, I still focus the major part of my days reading and writting those two assignments. What a life!

And i'm sorry for telling those boring things. And also sorry to have nothing else to say, something more interesting. Because nothing is happening in my life (see above).

Getting younger

2006-11-20T23:20:00.000+01:00

I hope you like the new design of the blog. It took me some times (4 hours) as my HTML mode is at the zero level. I know, 4 hours lost instead of reading my favourite books and writting writting writting... Yes, but there is something new. Deadline is on friday, not thursday !

Anyway, enjoy it !!!

Picture from the wall of my room in France

Drawing by Cédric

I should have...

2006-11-20T18:48:00.000+01:00

I should have titled saturday's post:

'So lonely inside, so busy out there'

Stuck between a rock and books

2006-11-19T19:59:00.000+01:00

All right. Back to reality. Take-home exam and book review. Deadline: thursday, 12pm.

The book I read for the book review was kind of boring. It's called "Path to the green world" and explained the relationship between economical politics and environment through 4 different perspectives (Market-liberals, institutionalists, bioenvironmentalist and social greens).The book is pretty boring to be honest, as the authors repeat the same shit over the pages. Out of the 8 chapters, reading only the two first and the last one is enough. Whatever, I read everything.
About the take-home exam, two questions, the first about the implementation of the different inernational environmental agreements: are well-implemented, and if not, what are the causes and the solutions. Second question about democratisation of environmental governance. What is the role of the different groups (state, NGOs, private orporations...). Two books and a half to read. Yeah, I know...

So apart reading and typing, I don't think I'll be able to do that many things the next following days. Pouin pouin pouin...

The new BP is in my laptop... A nuclear bomb is in my laptop...

Late night thoughts

2006-11-19T02:58:00.000+01:00

2.50am. Just back from a party. I didn't drink tonite, I had to drive my car. I felt like never before, don't know really what it was. But it was a nice feeling. You know, not having your three beers to have fun, dance, talk to people.

Now I'm trying to talk with Summer on MSN but she's not here. Damn it.

It seems like at 4.30, I should get outside and watch the sky. Because it's gonna be a meteorite rain. Yeah! And we're lucky, the sky is clear. Should I get up? Should I wait?

Everything will be okay. The matter is not time, the matter is only us. But everything will be okay.

Nice friday evening yesterday...

2006-11-18T15:03:00.000+01:00

Why people do not do what they want?
Why are they almost always stopped by barriers?
How is it possible to have circumstances that tells to no act as desires would?
Why people keep saying it is too complicated for this kind of relationship now?
What is complicated? Please, explain to me?
"I like you a lot. You like me a lot." What's the big deal though? What is complicated?
"Oh yeah, maybe it is not good to do it because of our situation. And if it turns out that it doesn't work, something will change, and what will happen of us?"
"And what will the others think?"
What is it? What keeps our feeling enclosed deep inside, and that, when they suddenly come to the surface, are kicked by thousands of circumstances...
"Maybe we should wait?"

We know where we are today, but we don't know where we'll be tomorrow...
So why waiting? Why not doing something we want more than anything? This is a just to remind some of my friends...

Here is a quotation from one of the new song of Bloc Party, the song is "waiting for the 7.18":

If I could it again

I'd make more mistakes

I'd not be so scared

of falling

If i could do it again

I'd climb more trees

I'd pick and I'd eat

More wild...blackberries.

ScubaDrew forever

2006-11-17T01:00:00.000+01:00

Hello folk!
Here is a short video made by a man I really appreciate. He was my diving instructor in Hawaii, and apart from teaching how to dive, he is profesional underwater cameraman... And he is good at it.So here is a small video made by him. The site is called Shark Cove, that we've made twice together and I think some of the shots have been taking some days I was around ;-) ). By the way, he's called ScubaDrew...

If you want to see more videos, you can check his website. And if you go one day on the North Shore of Oahu, Hawaii, give him a call and you'll have the time of your life.
Thank you ScubaDrew !!!

Ghost in the shell

2006-11-15T20:26:00.000+01:00

Ben Carole and I, we have all the reasons to believe that there is a ghost in the house.

We think he got in the house during the night from monday to tuesday. We think he walked around and try to disturb our night. I was laying in my bed since midnight. I was turning and turning and turning around in my double bed, once cold, once hot. I got up to open the window. I closed it. Still awake. I turned on my laptop and started playing stupid card games. Shut it down. Turned again. No way. I fell asleep around certainly 3.30 or 4, I'm not sure. I slept very bad and tuesday morning was such a challenge in class.
But this is not the only event that makes us believe that a ghost came in. It turned out that Carole and Ben had also trouble with their sleeping that night.
Around 1, Ben woke up after a terrible nightmare. He admited afterward he never makes nightmares. After that, he also had trouble falling asleep again. He woke up many times and in the morning, he was all sweaty like he run for hours.
And for Carole, she fell asleep pretty quick, but exactly few minutes after Ben woke up from his nightmare, she woke up too. She fell asleep again quickly, but after 3. She couldn't sleep anymore, right when I fall asleep...

Was this ghost playing with us? Did he want to annoy us? Did he want to get new friends? So many questions without answers...
We did answer one though: why did he came here, in our house? It seems that it is all my fault. During Halloween's party, I was making this loud laught Hohohohoho, and since then, I've been keeping doing it. Hearing me, he would have certainly thought that another real ghost was there. Because he was angry to find no ghost, he maybe bothered us during our sleeps.

Well, another usual story.